First, I’m peeved with our unit M.O. (medical officer) who can’t seem to get all his proverbial stuff together. I mean, maybe I’m getting an unfairly filtered picture of the guy (dear lord, I hope his wife and I don’t have mutual friends…does he even have a wife? I don’t even know his name. Maybe that makes all this ok. I am angry with a faceless officer of the United States Navy.), but it just seems like one thing after another through all this. He’s primarily there to make sure no one dies, I suppose, but ideally he’s contribute to morale, right? Like those dudes on MASH. They’re medical, they’re officers, and they’re stinkin’ hilarious. This guy isn’t funny at all.
First, he sets it up for all the guys to get their smallpox vaccine a mere five days before returning home from EMV back in July. Not at the beginning, in case something went wrong, not at the beginning, since they’d all be out there together with fellow vaccinnees and the incubation period wouldn’t matter. This means—ta da!—no close contact with wife and baby for at least two weeks, because you can get smallpox from the injection site. Nice. What a great way to come home after a month. Joe’s vaccine “didn’t take” so we were actually spared all the fun of that inconvenience. They said the guys who needed to be redone would be done right after they leave, sometime in the admin period before they get too far out in the boonies of you-know-where.
NOW the nutball has it all nicely arranged so that the guys whose original vaccines “didn’t take” (technical medical term, I have no idea what it means) can get their vaccine redone on Monday. MONDAY. Less than two weeks before they leave. Last two weeks before a deployment, and no one can touch Joe, or his laundry. And he can’t touch us. No playing with baby, no hugging his mom goodbye (she’s coming on Monday to visit for a week), no chillin’ with all the nieces and nephews that are coming in next week for V’s birthday party. Idiot medical officer.
Oh, also they’re getting a flu shot on Monday. Nice. Oh, and also he didn’t evidently feel like it was key to let everyone know at our pre-deployment brief (you know, the one in which they told us what to expect in these final weeks and then through the course of the deployment?) that these vaccinations would be coming up, as well as MALARIA PILLS. Malaria pills which give you intense nightmares. Very helpful. Good to have these things on my list of “things aware of and prepared for.” Nice to not have to stress or be concerned about them.